my love song season has started again,
exactly this time last year all I ever did was listen to lovesong - by Sara Bareilles because, well that’s besides the point, because someone sang it. & I have fallen for that person. well I fell for them way before that person sang, I fell in love with that person the day I saw them good days.
I didn't know it at the time, but that’s only because I tried to keep the love locked down, down below this earth.
But just like everything one day - everything comes out it always does.
even though yu may pay so much money for something to go away, you could turn a whole group of people away, you could just pick up a few thing's & run away everything you have tried hiding for so long can come out, this hurtful, big, little box that when open can cause either happiness or sadness is called a secret. It can cause some to hate or other's to love, it has the power to change people or the better or for the worse.
I tried keeping this secret, but im sorry, you’re just to hard to forget, I couldn’t just pay you to go away, maybe if I was a billionaire I maybe could've but it wouldn’t of helped the situation much. I wish I could of just ignored you for the rest of well our years but that would've of just made it even more harder.
we started out so good, everything seemed to just click between all of us, we were pretty much best of friends, I cared for you & I hope that yu cared for me then, I always looked out for you, gave yu the heads up wherever i could help you with, every question you asked me I always tried my best to answer it.
Every time you walked near me, I went through heart attack, every time you looked at me, I had to look away, I swear you must have caused permanent damage to my nervous system because I got nervous just hearing your name, when I saw you from afar, when I heard your voices, when you came near me, when you would just glance over at me – my body froze, my mind went crazy, the words that were meant to come out just became small talk, the things that I really wanted to do became “I should’ve or I could off’s,”
Everything became should’ve , would’ve could’ve in a blink of an eye, in a moment , in a letter & a very slow painful shattering heart beat,
One year - &I could say some progress has been made, but its been very slow, but I have the patience that some may lack, & I’ll wait for them, I’ll wait again until the sunshine Spring days where the crisp cold air brings a hint of togetherness & memories back + the sudden pull back to reality, just like the good days.
I’ll wait because – I love you
Even though to some forever may be a day or two my forever is however long it takes for you to realize that I’m here for you & always will be here for you.,
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